What's really going on in your head?

i havent blogged in three months, not because i havent had the time to but because i dont really have much good things to say.. which my blog isnt for just good things its for me to express my feelings where people choose to read.. Im not sure what is going on with me, my life is just kind of falling apart slowly but not really.. if that makes any sense. I dont know whats wrong with me.. Ive been drinking more, making bad decsions, letting myself go and hurting others even myself. Is it because i crave another person who wants nothing to do with me? Because i let myself fall back to square one when i first started blogging?? has to be right?? I dont get it, i was doing so good until january came.. i met someone.. let go of others. it all was ruined. my fault? yes, his fault? yes. im just going to keep it at the fact that i had fallen for someone that i actually wanted to give the world to, things went well, then things slowly turned for the worst. Im beginning to think i